WHY YOU’RE LIKELY TO FEEL LOW AROUND THE HOLIDAY SEASON

Why You’re Likely to Feel Low Around The Holiday Season

The holiday season may be “the most wonderful time of the year,” but it’s the most dreaded for some.

Jeannette Qhek · 14 December 2022 | Category: Wellness, Mental Health, Personal Development

It’s December..and you probably know what that means. Yes, it means the holiday season’s here! I recently came across a follower’s comment asking, “is it just me or do some people get anxiety during festive days?” And the comment prompted me to write this article.

The festive, or holiday season, as we all know, is supposed to be a joyous time full of celebrations with our loved ones. Yet for some, “the most wonderful time of year” brings nothing but holiday blues and stress.

If you find yourself feeling sort of low, anxious or notice that your mood starts to shift as the festive season approaches, know that you are not alone. Holiday seasons can trigger sadness, anxiety and depression in some of us.

Last year, I wrote a blog post “Have Yourself a Mindful Merry Christmas“, sharing my experience of having anxiety-provoking thoughts around the holiday season. In today’s article, let’s explore why this may be happening and does one deal with “holiday blues”.

Science behind the “holiday blues” phenomenon?

One of the explanations is that the holiday season often brings about an unsaid expectation for you to be in high spirits because everyone else around you is in that frame of mind. This may also be more prevalent in certain cultural contexts. For example, in more collectivistic cultures, people may find a greater pressure to conform to the behaviour of others.

The pressure to be happy often triggers the opposite, and leaves people feeling worse. In a study, it was found that the more pressure there is for people to be happy, the less likely it will be that individual feel that they actually are happy [1]. People compare their emotions to what they assume others are experiencing or what they’re supposed to feel.

The holidays can bring about difficult emotions for anyone, but this time of year may be especially difficult for people living with depression. Research suggests that for those who may be battling depression beforehand, the holiday season may amplify symptoms.

How to cope with the “holiday blues”?

Fortunately, there are practical strategies that can help you feel better. Let’s review five of them:

1. Acknowledge how you feel

It’s essential to recognise and acknowledge how you are feeling. Research found that people who accept their mental/emotional experiences attain better psychological health, as acceptance help them experience less negative feelings in response to stressors [2].

For instance, if someone close to you has passed away recently or if you’re having a relationship issue with your loved ones – it’s absolutely normal to not be in the mood for celebration and fun.

You don’t have to force yourself to be happy just because you think the time of the year demands it. Acknowledge what you’re feeling and take your time to heal or even experience the uncomfortableness or grief (if any) that’s within you.

2. Don’t say “yes” when you want to say “no”

Be comfortable saying “no” to things, events or people that may cause you stress. While avoidance can sometimes perpetuate anxiety as shared in “How to Win at the Game of “What If”s?” setting healthy boundaries involves standing up for your needs as a form of self-care strategy.

Brene Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston, defines healthy boundaries as “our lists of what’s okay and not okay.” For example, if you don’t want another glass of wine because you know it might trigger anxiety, don’t drink it.

Being able to set boundaries doesn’t always come naturally or easily, but trust that the more you practice, the better you will get.

3. Stay active and get outdoors

Staying active is one of the best science-backed ways to cope with depression during any season, and the holidays are no exception. A meta-analysis of 23 studies showed that exercise is an effective way to manage depression [3].

Getting outside for a walk yields psychological benefits and helps to reduce depressive and anxiety symptoms. Healthy doses of vitamin D from sun exposure also contributes to the prevention of conditions like depression [4].

4. Limit your social media time

Social media doesn’t always make people feel better. In fact, there is growing concern it may worsen your mental health. Studies have found a strong association between social media usage and an increased risk for depression, anxiety, and even suicidal thoughts [5].

Social media usage tend to be higher during the holiday seasons, when people have more free time to scroll through their feed. Remember that people’s lives aren’t as rosy as they portray on social media—this can be hard to realise when you are feeling low. You can limit your time on your devices and spend time with the people you care about or doing things you enjoy.

5. Importantly, be true to yourself

The holiday seasons do not have to be the way you envisioned it when you were a kid or even 3 years ago. People and relationships change- be true to yourself and be open to newness. Sometimes, how we feel and what makes us joyful can change and that’s normal. Honour what is best for you at the moment.

Where can you seek for help?

While the above self-help strategies may ease life with depression, they rarely work on their own.

Receiving treatment and guidance from a mental health provider is needed for long-term improvement. You can find professional help through a variety of avenues and resources here.

I’m sending you all the well wishes this holiday season! 🙂

References

[1] Dejonckheere, E., Rhee, J. J., Baguma, P. K., Barry, O., Becker, M., Bilewicz, M., Castelain, T., Costantini, G., Dimdins, G., Espinosa, A., Finchilescu, G., Friese, M., Gastardo-Conaco, M. C., Gómez, A., González, R., Goto, N., Halama, P., Hurtado-Parrado, C., Jiga-Boy, G. M., … Bastian, B. (2022). Perceiving societal pressure to be happy is linked to poor well-being, especially in happy nations. Scientific Reports, 12(1), [1514]. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41598-021-04262-z

[2] Ford, B. Q., Lam, P., John, O. P., & Mauss, I. B. (2018). The psychological health benefits of accepting negative emotions and thoughts: Laboratory, diary, and longitudinal evidence. Journal of personality and social psychology, 115(6), 1075–1092. https://doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000157

[3] Kvam, S., Kleppe, C. L., Nordhus, I. H., & Hovland, A. (2016). Exercise as a treatment for depression: A meta-analysis. Journal of affective disorders, 202, 67–86. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2016.03.063

[4] Penckofer, S., Kouba, J., Byrn, M., & Estwing Ferrans, C. (2010). Vitamin D and depression: where is all the sunshine?. Issues in mental health nursing, 31(6), 385–393. https://doi.org/10.3109/01612840903437657

[5] Karim, F., Oyewande, A. A., Abdalla, L. F., Chaudhry Ehsanullah, R., & Khan, S. (2020). Social Media Use and Its Connection to Mental Health: A Systematic Review. Cureus, 12(6), e8627. https://doi.org/10.7759/cureus.8627

Written By:
Jeannette Qhek
BSc in Psychology & Human Resources (Singapore Management University)
Founder of Chill By Nette